MARCH MAYHEM!
COME TO CANTERBURY!
Here’s an important date for your diary if you’re UK-based and a fan of horror and dark literature.
The Canterbury Horror Tales Book Con takes place at Westgate Hall, Canterbury, on 29 March 2025. The free-to-attend event involves over 40 indie authors from the UK and Europe, and offers visitors an engaging and entertaining experience.
Organised by the Indie Horror Chapter, a collective of independent horror writers, the event is designed to deliver more than a book convention, and features a programme of additional attractions. Readers can not only meet and chat with the authors, but can also enjoy a host of other activities including readings, discussion panels, and more.
I will be there, and the event will also see the first public sale of The Cunterbury Tales, which is strictly limited to 69 copies.
So, get yourself to Canterbury, come and say hello, and enjoy a day of madness, mayhem and mirth (and other stuff which doesn’t begin with an M).
THE MIDWIFE’S TALE - A READING
Some people have been asking what to expect from The Cunterbury Tales. This video features a full reading of The Midwife’s Tale from the limited edition charity paperback, which will go on public sale at the Canterbury Horror Tales Book Con at the end of March 2025.
LAST CHANCE TO PLAY CUNT & FUCK
What, you might ask, is Cunt and Fuck?
As some of you will be aware, I’ve written a book specially for the Canterbury Horror Tales event, which is taking place on 29 March. Based on Chaucer’s work, The Cunterbury Tales is made up of 24 pieces (two prose and the remainder in octosyllabic rhyming couplets), and follows some of the world’s worst pilgrims on their journey to venerate the withered spleen of Saint Augustine.
It’s a limited edition. There will only be 69 copies of this paperback, and each one will be numbered and signed (and no doubt violated with a crude drawing). There will never be any reprints. There will never be any alternative printed versions. This is it: 69 paperbacks printed, 69 paperbacks sold, end of fucking subject.
Playing is easy! The book comes in at 156 pages with 24 pieces. All you have to do is guess how many times the words “Cunt” and “Fuck” appear in the book.
What do you win? Well, apart from being the Official Champion of Cunt and Fuck, you’ll win a signed copy of any of my books (excluding The Cunterbury Tales). You will also definitely receive an offer to buy a copy of the limited edition book, even if your not at the Canterbury show.
ENTRIES TO CUNT AND FUCK WILL CLOSE ON 16 MARCH 2025!
HOW PUERILE ARE YOU?
The truly puerile amongst you will realise the most sought-after copy of The Cunterbury Tales will be copy 69 of 69.
Copy 69 of 69 will not be available for general sale. The object of the book is to raise money for Lingen Davies Cancer Fund, so copy 69 will be sold to the highest bidder. They’ll also receive a bundle of goodies, including some genuine one-offs which won’t be available elsewhere!